How should we judge a government?

In Malaysia, if you don't watch television or read newspapers, you are uninformed; but if you do, you are misinformed!

"If you're not careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed, and loving the people who are doing the oppressing." - Malcolm X

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience - Mark Twain

Why we should be against censorship in a court of law: Publicity is the very soul of justice … it keeps the judge himself, while trying, under trial. - Jeremy Bentham

"Our government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no
responsibility at the other. " - Ronald Reagan

Government fed by the people

Government fed by the people

Career options

Career options
I suggest government... because nobody has ever been caught.

Corruption so prevalent it affects English language?

Corruption so prevalent it affects English language?
Corruption is so prevalent it affects English language?

When there's too much dirt...

When there's too much dirt...
We need better tools... to cover up mega corruptions.

Prevent bullying now!

Prevent bullying now!
If you're not going to speak up, how is the world supposed to know you exist? “Orang boleh pandai setinggi langit, tapi selama ia tidak menulis, ia akan hilang di dalam masyarakat dan dari sejarah.” - Ananta Prameodya Toer (Your intellect may soar to the sky but if you do not write, you will be lost from society and to history.)

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

German parade floats...

during this year’s carnival parade in Germany, originally a Roman Catholic tradition...

Weapon of mass nasal congestion?...



Bill couldn't resist...


Hang on, Hilary!

Link

A bit on John Lennon's Will

The wisdom of John Lennon

John Lennon, the ex-Beatle shot dead in the streets of New York in December, 1980, left half his wealth calculated at more than GBP150 million and said to be growing by GBP100,000 a day from world-wide record royalties, to his wife Ono, with the other half held on trust for undisclosed beneficiaries.

The will contained a provision that if any named beneficiary "objects or takes court action in any way... then I direct that such legatee or beneficiary shall receive nothing whatsoever."

(From an article, Willpower over the living! which appeared in The Malay Mail on August 5, 1983)
Link

Can NFC rely on M&A to take precedence over Loan Agreement?

Memorandum and Articles of Association of a company set the rules on how a company operates its business and have no effect on other entities which it deals with, other than to let them know that the company's business is included in its Memorandum and that the directors acted according to its Articles.

Basically, a company's Memorandum of association contains an objects clause, which limits its capacity to act. When limited companies were incorporated, the objects clause had to be widely drafted so as not to restrict the board of directors in their day to day trading. The Articles set out the rules relating to issuance of shares, appointment of directors, notices required for meetings and so on. Together with the memorandum of association, they are the constitution of a company.

According to MP for PJ Utara, YB Tony Pua:

"Even to someone not trained in law like myself, the statement from NFCorp must be one of the most preposterous but beautifully written legal gobbledegook I've read in my short political career.

There is absolutely no provision in the loan agreement for the use of the monies to be "guided" by the company's MAA. The fact that NFCorp MAA may allow the company to set up a casino does not in any "legalise" the use of the loan funds for its set up. The Government's stake in the company makes absolutely no difference to the legal effect of the loan agreement."

"Firstly, given the strict purpose of the agreement to promote cattle-farming, surely any acquisition of property must be directly related to the industry such as cattle-grazing land.

Secondly, and most incredibly, surely NFCorp can't be arguing that the luxury condominiums they have purchased can be defined in any possible way as "landed property". Or worse, that they were purchased for cattle-rearing purposes, or would we find new technological wonders on how to farm cattles in high-rise luxury residences?"

Monday, February 27, 2012

If Albert Einstein could be a genius, so can you...


This school examination results was nothing to shout about in 19th century, but happened to belong to Albert Einstein!
Link

Woman who signed away inheritance

The Irish lawyer Maurice Healy recounts in his book, The Old Munster Circuit, the story of a well-to-do Irishman who made his money in America, and returned to Ireland to die.

He had quarreled with his family, and lived with a small farmer and his wife, who looked after him well. As often happens in such circumstances, the farmer's wife's one worry was to make sure of getting the old man's money.

The priest told him that it was his duty to make a will. "Leave the room!" the priest ordered the farmer's wife. Reluctantly she went and alone the priest helped the dying man to make his will. A serving girl was called in to be the second witness. As soon as the priest had departed, the wife could contain herself no longer: she crept into the room and, with the body lying stiff on the bed, searched everywhere for the will.

At last, she found it: all was well, everything was left to her and her husband. "There it stood," relates Healey, "witnessed by the priest and the girl." But she still felt unsafe. Somehow the piece of paper seemed so naked, with just those two signatures upon it, and that of the man now lying dead before her.

She took pen and ink, and wrote in her own name as that of a third witness - thereby signing away her own inheritance and that of her husband, and ensuring that everything went to the distant relatives in the United States whom her lodger, with almost his last breath, had tried to exclude.

Alas, she did not know that neither a witness nor the husband or wife of a witness can usually receive anything under a will that they sign as a witness.

(From an article, Willpower over the living, which appeared in The Malay Mail on August 5, 1983)
Link

A bit on Wills

Under Malaysian law governing the distribution of assets of a person who dies intestate (without leaving a will) the widow receives one-third of the property and the remaining two-thirds is shared out among the children.

In the event that there are no children, half the property goes to the widow. The deceased's surviving parents then inherit the other half.

If there are no parents, the brothers and sisters; if not, then the uncles and aunts, take the half. Only if there is nobody else can the widow take all.

On the other hand, the husband gets the whole of the dead wife's estate if she does not leave a will.

“In view of this unbalanced Distribution Law on Intestacy, a woman with wealth and property has more reasons to make a will.” to quote Mr. Lai Nai Sing, manager of HSBC Trustee Bhd, in 1982.

Mr. Lai also warned that any person who qualified as a beneficiary should not be left out of the will. “Under the Inheritance Family Provision Act, a man must provide for those whom he is legally bound to provide for.”

“Thus, even if there is a black sheep of a son you do not care for, do not leave him out. Even if you leave him only a dollar, this will close the door to any litigation.”

Another point to note is that any gift or gifts to attesting witnesses or their spouses shall be void. For example, you should not sign as a witness to your father-in-law's will which leaves everything to your husband.

Apart from this, a will is valid only if it fulfills these four conditions:

1. The person who makes it must be of age (over 18 years in Malaysia);
2. He or she must be of sound mind;
3. The will must be in writing;
4. The signature must be witnessed by two independent witnesses (people who are not beneficiaries to the will).

(From an article, Why it's important to make your will, published in The Star on September 23, 1982.)

What will you do if your mother inherited 1/3 of 2/3 of her father's property, in accordance with the law on intestacy?

We have a strange situation where my mother was asked to sign off her share (2/9), to be shared equally between her two late brothers' families. Was there undue pressure or influence which made her sign the will in 1975? The fact that my mother signed a new will (which according to the law on wills, would have superseded the earlier will) without any mention of the provisions of the first will, has now open the possibility of our claim, as beneficiaries, to the property in question. That the administrator (a grandson) of our grandfather's estate, was the sole beneficiary of our grandmother's one-third share sure makes it suspicious to any outsider.

Link

I'm tired of being principled...

when dealing with unscrupulous people.

For bullies, they should be mindful of the phrase 'don't do unto others what you don't want others do unto you'. There is a limit as to how much the victims can put up with the nonsense thrown at them without retaliation.

There are those who fit the description, 'Lord of all that he surveys' and feel that 'what is mine is mine, and what is yours is also mine', without giving a thought about common decency and natural justice. Ignore them and they take you for fools, and it is not going to work because they would keep mocking you for a response.
Link

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Medicare coverage in a nutshell

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello.'

'Mrs. Sanders, please.'

'Speaking.'

'Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good.'

What do you mean?' Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.

'Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is which.'

That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?' questioned Mrs. Sanders.

'Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time.'

'Well, what am I supposed to do now?'

'The folks at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town.

If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.'
Link

Best takes on 3 US Presidents




Link

Friday, February 24, 2012

Taiwan Tornado... spoiled by local thunder storm...

Problem with using Astro decoder: while watching Taiwan Tornado on NTV7 yesterday, there was a sudden thunder storm and the usual message that 'it is currently unavailable...' just when it was most exciting when the 2 kidnappers were about to shoot their way out while holding on to their hostage...


Thought I found it, but the above clip does not look like it. Anyway, I prefer it in its original Hokien dialogue instead of the above dubbed Mandarin.

Been watching the tv serial to try and brush up my understanding of Taiwanese Hokien as well as figuring out some of the Chinese names which are very different when the Mandarin version is romanized instead of Hokien version.
Link

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Initials could mean different things to different people


I used to joke about the fuel meter in a car with E for Enough (instead of Empty), and F for Finished (instead of Full). Here is a new one...

Achar buys the new Automatic BMW X8 sport.

He drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just won’t move at all.

He tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck.

He then furiously calls the BMW dealers and they send out a technician to him, the technician asks “ Sir, are you sure you are using the right gears?”

Full of anger Achar replies: “You fool, idiot man, how you could ask such a question, I'm not stupid!! I use D for the Day and N for the Night...”

If the above do not make sense, don't worry... they are not supposed to.


What my friend forwarded to me:

"Some Hospitals in Singapore may have names changed to cater to Kiasu Citizens...

Do you know why New Changi Hospital (NCH) changed its name to Changi General
Hospital (CGH)?

Because NCH stands for 'Never Come Home.

That's why business was very bad before it changed its name.

Now CGH stands for 'Can Go Home'. So business is picking up.

Business in Singapore General Hospital (SGH) is still going strong because
SGH stands for 'Sure Go Home'!

Now National University Hospital (NUH) is also considering a name change.
It stands for 'No Use Hospital'!

What about Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH).
Not too good a name, no wonder so much problem. It stands for 'Tiam Tiam Si
Hospital' (Always Die or Die Quietly).

So, be careful of choosing which hospital to go if anyone is unwell. "




Link

A bit on Islamic banking principles

I first came across housing loans based on Islamic banking principles, 20 years ago. I was told, from housing developer's point, we still get the progress payments according to the Standard Sale and Purchase Agreement, and leave the rest to the purchaser and the bank providing the loan. It was the first time I came across novation agreements which is the Islamic way of doing away with the 'interest' factor and replace it with something more halal. Basically, the bank buys the property and resells it to the purchaser at a price which is inclusive of the total interest at the end of the loan period.

According to Wikipedia: “In contract law and business law, novation is the act of either replacing an obligation to perform with a new obligation, or replacing a party to an agreement with a new party. In contrast to an assignment, which is valid so long as the obligee (person receiving the benefit of the bargain) is given notice, a novation is valid only with the consent of all parties to the original agreement: the obligee must consent to the replacement of the original obligor with the new obligor.A contract transferred by the novation process transfers all duties and obligations from the original obligor to the new obligor...”

I had no idea what could happen in case a borrower defaults. So it comes to me as shocking when a friend forwarded the following article:

Questionable Islamic banking principles
Two brothers who borrowed RM264,317 from RHB Islamic Bank to buy an apartment saw the loan balloon to RM624,263.42 in three years.

KUCHING: Bank Negara Malaysia must immediately investigate the practice of banks charging interests on loans under the Islamic banking principles as this is tantamount to borrowing money from loan sharks, claims Sarawak DAP.

According to party secretary Chong Chieng Jen, under the Islamic banking principles, a borrower who defaults on his loan payment would be charged future interests on the period of the loan, if, for instance, it is a 30-year loan.

He cited two brothers surnamed Chang who suffered as a result of the Islamic banking principle.

The Changs in October 2006 borrowed RM264,317 from RHB Islamic Bank Bhd to part-finance the purchase of an apartment.

After paying the loan for a year, sometime in October 2007, the borrowers defaulted and in July 2009, the RHB Islamic Bank entered judgment against the borrowers for a sum of RM624,263.42.

According to Chong, on Jan 6, 2011, the apartment which was the security for the facility was auctioned off for about RM200,000. After deducting expenses, a net RM192,750.31 was paid towards part-settlement of the outstanding amount owed by the borrowers, leaving an outstanding sum of RM431, 513.11.

RHB Islamic Bank has now filed a bankruptcy notice on the RM431, 513.11 claiming the borrowers owed them the amount.

“In a short span of three years, the borrowers’ loan of RM264,317 has ballooned to RM624,263.42.

“The borrowers requested for their statements of account from the bank, but it refused to give them one.

"From the figures above, it is obvious that RHB Islamic Bank is charging future interest for 30 years on the amount owed and all future interests are now debited into the present account of the borrowers.

“The effect is similar to loan sharks’ interest rate,” said Chong, who is also the Kota Sentosa assemblyman and Bandar Kuching MP.

‘Courts have different views’

According to the letter of offer in the Chang case, the interest rate for the first year is 1.25% per annum, the second year 3.5% per annum and thereafter 7.6% per annum.

“Given such interest rates and the fact that the borrowers have made regular payments in the first year, the amount outstanding plus interest up till July 2009 (date of judgment) should not be more than RM285,000.

“After deducting the proceeds of the auction sale of the apartment, the total outstanding debt should not exceed RM100, 000.

“However, under the Islamic banking principles, the total outstanding debt is now RM431,513.11,” he said.

Chong called on Bank Negara to look into the matter urgently given the gross injustice in the method of calculation under the Islamic banking principles.

He said that one of the borrowers is a government servant while the other is doing some small business.

“They are able to repay an outstanding sum of RM100,000. However, given the alleged outstanding sum of RM431,5113.11, it is impossible for them to pay and it is also highly inequitable to compel them to pay.

“If RHB Islamic Bank were allowed to proceed with the bankruptcy proceedings, the borrowers’ career and small business will be adversely affected,” he said.

Chong said that the court has different views on the issue. Some judges said that such calculation is wrong, while others said that is the purchase price, and the banks have the right to calculate as such.

“As the court has different views, Bank Negara has to step in and once and for all ensure that all banks are subject to the same ruling.

“Lots of people don’t know about these Islamic banking principles as the banks will never tell their clients. This is a serious problem affecting the banking industry,” he said.

Link

Logo Jati ori ke?

"This logo looks like the one used for recycled item." But some say it looks like 'Satan's Logo'...

Source:
http://malaysia-today.net/mtcolumns/newscommentaries/47500-satans-logo-designer-says-he-likes-jatis-logo-better
Link

'Where did I come from?'

"I was shocked to read our Home Ministry has ordered an immediate stop to the sale of “Where Did I Come From?”, an illustrated book for children that explains well… where we all come from.

I remember buying that book for my youngest brother when he was just six or seven years old.

It’s a lovely book that teaches you the proper names for the various parts of the anatomy (penis rhymes with peanuts) and told about how your parents fell in love, had sex and made you.

Sure, there are naked people in the book — illustrated, mind — but there is nothing pornographic about it.

Now, more than 35 years after I first bought that book for my brother — who by the way did not become a deviant or pervert — they are saying the book “might be suitable for children at the writer’s country of origin” but is not suitable for Malaysia.

What absolute rubbish!

I reckon if more kids grew up reading “Where Did I Come From?” we may actually have fewer “accidents” resulting in unwanted pregnancies.

At the end of the day, you can see porn everywhere should you choose to.

Instead what I find obscene is the people at the Home Ministry treating a book that teaches basic sex education to children as pornography."

What I think - Joan Lau

Malaysia is slipping backwards instead.
Link

Children's impressions of Angels

Angels work for God and watch over kids when God has to go do something else.
-Mitchell, age 7

Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go south for the winter.
-Sara, age 6

Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter.
-Jared, age 8

Angels don 't eat, but they drink milk from Holy Cows!!!
-Jack, age 6

Everybody's got it all wrong. Angels don 't wear halos anymore. I forget why, but scientists are working on it.
-Olive, age 9

Angels talk all the way while they're flying you up to heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead.
Daniel, age 9

My guardian angel helps me with math, but he's not much good for science.
-Henry, age 8

It's not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to Heaven, and then there's still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes.
-Matthew, age 9

All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn't go for it.
-Antonio, age 9

My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
-Ashley, age 9

Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don 't make the animals get better, they help the child get over it.
- Vicki , age 8

When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath again, somewhere there's a tornado.
-Reagan, age 10

What I don 't get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them.
- Sarah , age 7
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Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Kara's ok...


Link

What happened to 'justice must be seen to be fair'?

The Malaysian Insider: Umno lawyer confirms highway award, says not a ‘deal’ for Perak

Amazing coincidence indeed! Malaysia's most successful lawyer (as in always wins) and former CJ's wife happen to be highly skilled in building highways.

Link

From FB: Dividends from KWSP, TH and ASB over the years......

used to judge the performance of our Finance Ministers...

"Nik Nazmi Nik Ahmad and Charles Santiago were tagged in Mohd Roszeli M's photo. — with Faekah Binti Husin and 10 others."




According to Mohd Roszeli M: Imbas kembali Dividen KWSP, ASB & TH - Semak fakta angka dan peratusan sebagai satu pedoman untuk membuat keputusan, kritikan ataupun pandangan.....Finance Minister-1957-1959-Hau Shaik Lee,1959-1969-Tan Siew Sin,1969-1970-Razak,1970-1974-Tan Siew Sin,1974-1976-Hussien Onn,1976-1984-Ku Li, 1985-1990-Daim, 1991-1998-Anwar,1998-1999-Mahthir,1991-2001-Daim,2001-2003-Mahathir,2003-2008-Dollah,2008-Now-Najib...

— with Subra Raja, Lim Kit Siang, Zar Ali, Pak Syed Shahir, Ramlan Yahya, Kula Segaran, Charles Santiago, Nik Nazmi Nik Ahmad, Faekah Binti Husin,Saifuddin Nasution, Abdullah Sani, Khalid Samadand CM Lim Guan Eng.



Link

Monday, February 20, 2012

Zits: gaping generation gap...

the gall of Jeremy!

Parting shot from Jeremy to his mum: "You might want to get more organized."
Link

Jumping to conclusion...

Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.

From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two.

She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.

As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.

"Hi Darling", he says, "Your parents have come to visit us, so l let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you said Hello to them...

OMG!!!

Link

Dr. M. Bakri Musa's take on fellow Malays

"As I reflect on the many sordid scandals that have blighted Malaysia over the years, I am struck by one sobering observation. That is, the principal players are Malays like me, and of my vintage.

There are exceptions, of course. The mega-ringgit Port Klang Free Zone Development is one. Then there was the Malaysian Chinese Association’s Deposit Taking Cooperative debacle of the mid 1980s. So as not to slight the Indian community, there was the equally ugly affair of MAIKA, the investment arm of the Malaysian Indian Congress.

In East Malaysia there was the Chief Minister of Sabah, one Osu Bin Haji Sukam, who skipped on his multimillion-pound gambling debt incurred in a London casino. His Haji father would roll over in his grave on that one. On a far grander scale with respect to sheer avarice and outrageous obscenity would be the still-to-be-fully-accounted glutton of another chief minister, this one of Sarawak. Purists may argue that these two characters are not Melayu tulen (“pure” Malays), so I will not focus on them...."

"...You do not realize how slothful you look until you are in the company of the well-groomed. Thus we need more Malays like Syed Mokthar, Zaid Ibrahim and my recently-departed dear friend Dr. Badri Muhammad to shame and bring to the ground these high-flying former kampong boys and girls, as Ambassador Locke is now doing to Chinese officials."

More interesting stuff between those opening and closing excerpts:

Grounding Those High-Flying Kampong Boys
Link

Sunday, February 19, 2012

What could happen when a country is in dire straits

This is the dramatic moment a Greek woman threatened to jump from an Athens building - because she was about to lose her job because of the euro debt crisis. The suicide threat came after Greece's Public Order Minister Christos Papoutsis had warned: 'Greece has made all the efforts that it needed to do, and the people cannot take any more.
Link

Understanding women...

But, will you have the chance to put to test? I have known too many instances of a wife who would expect to be treated like a lady (as in expecting husband to do all the unpleasant chores) yet expect equality or even more rights in other aspects. Sadly, the time to put to the test is when husband is incapacitated or gone. But he has himself to blame for such a situation because...

What Debate?

Often we missed watching programmes because we got distracted by other things. The much awaited debate between Lim Guan Eng and Dr. Chua Soi Lek was one example, except we remembered when chatting when it was still on. Being new to Astro, that channel AEC is also 301 was known to me only recently. It was also strange that we were watching it next to Dr. Mah's house when he was one of those who posed questions!

Later, when Cheng called, she didn't know there was such a 'Big Debate' between two Chinese leaders of opposite political divide. I informed her of various links which reported on it. From what I have gathered from reactions after the debate, some people questioned rightly that it was more of two political ceramahs held together rather than a proper debate. That moderator Tang Ah Chai was mistaken by some to be Michael Yeoh of ASLI was amusing. I can imagine both debaters were prepared to gain political mileage from the televised event. I would blame this to the lack of such opportunities because of our national television channels being controlled by BN. It could be also because of the unwillingness of BN leaders to be subjected to public scrutiny, either of their lack of ability or their awkward position of having to defend some indefensible policies and projects. I am sure if more of such events are being held, the candidates would not have to take such opportunities to hold ceramahs instead.

It was also obvious that the organizers had shown their bias when the time allocated for questions was insufficient and MCA supporters got to pose more questions, mostly irrelevant to the topic. They were obviously prepared with the intention to embarrass Lim Guan Eng as Chief Minister of Penang.

The atmosphere could be described as surprisingly cordial between two political opponents and signify maturity on both sides, but that could not be said of the noisy MCA supporters. Two senior citizens complained about not being given the chance to pose questions.

Some people complained about the fact that it was between two Chinese political leaders, using Chinese language, about Chinese position in Malaysian politics, and through Chinese television channel! Well, in Malaysia, such criticisms are so common that it is better to think that it is impossible to please everybody and that we cannot escape the race factor in any discussion.

It is generally agreed that we should have more of such debates so that given the opportunities to do so, they would not be used to give political speeches instead. As expected, the next debate will be either in English or Bahasa Malaysia. But more than that, people are hoping that the suggested debate between PM, Najib and Opposition Leader, Anwar will take place. The good thing about a debate is that no matter how well prepared, one's ability to put across one's views will be shown and be subject to public scrutiny.


Link

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Much ado about an Honorary Doctorate?

Why is Dr. Rosmah always at the receiving end? It has a lot to do with her persona in the public stage. There are other wives of Malaysian PM but only she attracted unwanted publicity and criticisms. There must be obvious reasons, like for being the first to prefer being addressed as First Lady of Malaysia. Her demands for special attention to details to her satisfaction are well known to those who were involved in preparations where she was due to appear as guest of honour. Examples of her high-handedness heard through the grapevines include 'no empty seats when she is delivering a speech'; 'pictures due to appear in the newspapers must be previewed and chosen by her'; 'sections of Harrods closed when she was shopping there'; and so on. Though such stories could have been made up to discredit her, I am sure a genuinely lovable person would have been able to be her natural self and disprove all such attempts. To put it simply, she is 'too fake' or 'too put on' to be likeable. Rumours of botox treatments seem to reinforce this perception.

I am sure there must be some truth in claims that some obscure awards were arranged by PR firms and given publicity by them too. With too many instances of self-initiated image building, is it any wonder why an honorary doctorate awarded by a university is presumed to be bought, or at least a form of returning a favour or an inducement for preferential treatment?

In Malaysia, it is common to find honorary doctorates awarded by universities or their foreign associates to those who were responsible for setting up such private institutions. In a way, to those rich enough, it is easier to get one via this route than to study for it. Then there are degree mills churning out degrees, Masters and PhDs to order, to those who are crazy enough to think such false credentials could impress people. The irony of it is that people who are genuinely great and well known in their respective industries are likely to be humble and prefer not to disclose their credentials. Sometimes, it was more because of organizers who wish to publicize such information in order to attract participants in seminars and so on.

Are those who criticize Rosmah or Curtin University for awarding her the honorary doctorate being jealous of her or her success? First of all, she cannot stop people from wanting to criticize her, perhaps only when Facebook or other media decide to stop publishing them. She cannot stop those in coffee shops or bloggers.

For those who understand that such honorary doctorates are easily given to those in power or who have contributed financially to the universities, they would not bother with such vain expressions of greatness. To those who are in the process of writing theses and defending them successfully before they are awarded the 'PhD' which entitled them to use 'Dr.' before their names, there might be some frustration over the ease some people could do so. As a father of someone pursuing a doctorate, which normally takes at least 4 years, it is a test of patience for both student and parent. When it involved having to forgo a fantastic job offer because of commitment to her new supervisor, then it just shows how unfair it is in life when some could have their cake and eat it too!
Link

Tota's Open Letter to Dr. Chua Soi Lek

"For almost 50 long years, many Chinese Malaysians blindly gave their vote to the MCA. With their support, the Alliance/BN controlled Parliament and undermined democracy, points out Tota ahead of the Great Debate between Choi Soi Lek and Lim Guan Eng.

Soi Lek, hold your silence, apologise to the Chinese Malaysian community and repent.

You always claim that the MCA is the defender of ‘Chinese rights’ and that the party has done a great deal for the community. Your party’s record shows otherwise. The MCA has been in the Alliance/BN since independence, but politically and economically the position of Chinese Malaysians has nose-dived because the MCA representatives in the Cabinet and state governments have behaved like political eunuchs. Their behaviour shows how successfully emasculated the MCA is..."

the rest of the letter :

Friday, February 17, 2012

A bit on Virgin Trains

Recently, a friend in Facebook posted a picture of a letter she received from Virgin Trains which informs her of a cheque for GBP875 which they enclosed as compensation, presumably for some delays.

I was surprised, partly because I have not heard of Virgin Trains but more so because of the ease in getting compensated, something uncommon here in Malaysia. I have read about Air Asia using Virgin Airlines' business model and made a huge success of it, but the similarity ends there. I have read about many complaints and Air Asia's slow or no response, hardly of people being compensated.

Perhaps, we should also compare 'apples with apples' and compare Virgin Trains with our KTMB. My two-year petition has yet to get an official response, except a telephone call from someone who said they are looking into it!

I have just searched for Virgin Trains just to confirm there actually is such a rail company in UK, and I found their Passenger's Charter. This information plus the proof of my friend's receipt of compensation showed their seriousness in providing efficient train service.

Virgin Trains' Passenger's Charter (excerpt):

1. Introduction
1.1 The Charter
This is the Passenger’s Charter for West Coast Trains Ltd,
which operates under the name of ‘Virgin Trains’. It sets out
our commitment to give you the safe, high quality service you
have the right to expect. Any passenger purchasing a ticket
for use on services operated by Virgin Trains should enjoy:
• a reliable and punctual journey
• clean and safe trains and stations
• a Customer Service team member onboard each
train to be available to provide help if required
• a refreshment service on most trains
• a seat if reserved in advance
Copies of this Passenger’s Charter will be available at all major
stations used by Virgin Trains, from our Customer Relations
team and our website virgintrains.com ..."

Rest:
Link

National Debt: Easy to keep below ceiling...

just raise it! The Statutory Borrowing Ceiling had increased from 40% in 2003, to 45% in 2008, and 55% in 2009...

More in Malaysiakini:
DAP: Gov't manipulated laws to legitimise debt


Link

How to spot a political front-man...

when in trouble, he gets off scot-free! Eat your heart out. This is the BN's, or more specifically, Umno's, or most specifically, Tun Dr. Mahathir's way of financial management... win-win as in private profits, public liability! In other words, 'heads I win, tails you lose'; 'close one eye, shut the other'; ' sign lop-sided contracts which benefit a few (cronies) at the expense of the public'; and so on. For a better idea...

Tony Pua's post: Tajudin Ramli gets off scot free

Link

Robbing at random... can be ridiculous

Just imagine: smashed the side window of a car and tried to grab a toddler thinking she is a handbag!

"SUBANG JAYA: A 17-month old toddler nearly got whisked off from her baby seat in her mother's car by two men along Persiaran Kewajipan on Feb 10.

The two suspects who are still at large, had smashed the side window of the vehicle and reached out for the 'handbag' they thought was on the passenger seat only to realise it was a toddler.

Her mother Yap Yann Fang, 31 who was driving home to Damansara Idaman in Petaling Jaya from her babysitter's home in USJ1 at 9pm was left in shock with the incident.

'I had stopped at the traffic lights along Persiaran Kewajipan and in just a split second, my side window was smashed, scattering the glass all over me and my daughter Giselle.'

'The pillion reached out for Giselle only to realise it wasn't a handbag on my two-door vehicle passenger seat. They scooted off empty-handed,' she said during a press conference at ADUN Subang Jaya Hannah Yeoh's office."

More:
Link

Don't rely on Wikipedia for information

At breakfast yesterday morning, someone mentioned about our so-called First Couple. A friend mentioned about the recent wedding of Najib's daughter, and I said she is Rosmah's, especially having read about the controversies concerning whether it was private or official. But another friend said, no, she is Najib's first wife's daughter. I said I can easily check to see who is right. I didn't mean to be nosey but more out of curiosity and to test my memory, so I searched online just to get the facts right.

According to Wikipedia:

On Rosmah Mansor:

"She married Dato' Seri Najib Tun Razak in 1987 and the couple has two children - Nooryana Najwa and Norashman Razak. In addition to them, Rosmah also has three other children - Azrene Soraya (first marriage), and two other children from her second marriage with Abdul Aziz Nong Chik."

On Najib Tun Razak:

"In 1976 Najib married Tengku Puteri Zainah Tengku Eskandar ('Kui Yie') with whom he has three children: Mohd Nizar Najib (born 1978), Mohd Nazifuddin Najib and Puteri Norlisa Najib. In 1987 he divorced Ku Yie and married Datin Seri Rosmah Mansor with whom he has two children: Mohd Norashman Najib and Nooryana Najwa Najib. This is Rosmah's second marriage as well. She has two children from her previous marriage to Farid Ismeth Emir who was a former TV news presenter and currently a general manager in a trading company."

According to an article on Stress Control, among the items on the list, the following caught my attention:

"5. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague."

I wonder if the above rule applies in the surprising vagueness of details (especially numbers do not add up) concerning our First Couple. I am surprised nobody in our PM's overstaffed office bothered to correct the misinformation.

By the way, my sister-in-law just mentioned about her husband's complaint that some of his medical students treat Wikipedia as if it is an authoritative source for medical information!

Link

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Chinese mustard green at Rm7 per kg.!

(Pic courtesy of Three Tastes.com)

Chinese mustard green (gai choy in Cantonese) is a much sought after vegetable during Chinese New Year, simply because of the leftovers of pork, duck or chicken meat after a sumptuous reunion meal, which could be cooked with assam keping and dried chili to make the delicious sheen lart choy (or sour and hot vegetable dish which most Chinese would like to imagine how chop suey originated). It seems, according to one story which comes to mind, some Westerners went too late into a Chinese restaurant for food when most items on the menu were unavailable. Upon insistence to cook up something, the cook just mixed the leftovers to come up with chop suey!

Anyway, I like the one prepared by Pin Sum Restaurant in Menglembu during lunch time. But I was disappointed last Sunday, when what was served turned out to be white cabbage instead and with something else like curry powder added which put me off. With this in mind, when my wife called up a friend in Pusing to buy 5 kg. of gai choy at whatever price, I warned her that there could be a shortage because of CNY and it takes time to grow some. She was right in saying that the price could be too high for a restaurant to offer as a dish, when her friend called up this morning to say that she has bought 5 kg. at Rm7! Btw, don't believe what we see on tv about government officials checking prices on controlled items over festive seasons. Reality is such that supply and demand in the most basic form is the order of the day, and when in great demand, it is a seller's market with a 'take it or leave it' attitude.

What was the reason for this sudden interest in gai choy? Because our youngest, daughter asked for it on her last visit during CNY. Too bad she and brother and sister-in-law left for PJ on second day of CNY when her mother prepared the dish for her relatives. It was amazing how those who could normally afford and eat expensive dishes went for it as if it was a delicacy!

Another of her favourite is pak charm kai (steamed chicken similar to that of Hainanese chicken rice). This was the first dish she craved for when she recovered from dengue a few years ago, after a 10-stay in a private hospital. I mentioned private for a reason, not out of choice and definitely not to show off. During a dengue outbreak in BG a few years ago, residents were advised to seek medical attention when having prolonged fever. But I can still remember at the time, it was closed during weekends and so on for such outpatient treatment and it takes at least a few days before it can be confirmed if it was dengue.

Anyway, she is getting steamed home-bred yim kai to go with sheen lart choy! Some relatives who we know would enjoy sheen lart choy will be invited.
Link

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Selective kNohw Omar...

I came across these two headlines in The Malaysian Insider:

Noh Omar says has proof of Selangor sand graft

I don’t know, Noh Omar says of NFC breach of trust

You can bet MA Sissy will know which to dig into and which to leave alone.

I can still remember at the height of the sand graft controversies, someone pointed out that the biggest holes were due to years of sand-mining during BN's rule.
Link

KTMB Batu Gajah station: a possible question in Parliament?

More than 2 years ago, I had petitioned to KTMB for a scheduled stop at the old station on Jalan Pusing, because the new station is 2 km away from the main road (Jalan Tualang).

Since the new station was opened for use, train travellers had no choice but to accept it grudgingly. I believe it is possible, if only KTMB is willing, to have a scheduled stop at the old station. The old station needs minimum renovation for this purpose. In fact, for the convenience, if put to vote, I am sure the people are willing to accept the present condition! I have used a train stop in Differdange, Luxembourg, which has a concrete bench without even shelter! KTMB should admit its mistake and bear the responsibility of having chosen the inconvenient location, to be near the Railway complex instead of serving the public's convenience. Is it too much to ask to provide an alternative stop, if the people are all for it?

Our local MP, YB Fong Po Kuan has taken notice of a reminder of my earlier petition in Facebook and will be including it as one of her questions in Parliament. But to my disappointment, she has assumed KTMB will never ever consider another scheduled stop, and thus will be asking for feeder bus service instead. Honestly, I do not agree with her opinion because to me, it seems defeatist. KTMB has robbed the residents of Batu Gajah the convenience of its old railway station for a number of years already. Why can't they consider a scheduled stop instead of the hassle of providing feeder bus service? I had experienced the inconvenience of being in the train upon arrival in BG while waiting for another train to be shunted. By providing for another scheduled stop, the train driver just need to stop again a few kilometres away, wasting probably a few minutes for a good cause. In fact, train staff can find out from passengers if anyone wishes to stop at the old station. Service should be the priority of KTMB and this is what the resident train travellers wish for. They shall be eternally grateful if only KTMB consider this point.

In the recent incident near Tg. Malim where someone used a bomb hoax which delayed a train service to KL, KTMB was reported to have lost Rm500,000. Just imagine the vulnerability of train service to such pranks and electricity outage (another incident which affected ETS). We have yet to come across any travellers claiming for compensation as a result of the delay due to the bomb hoax. As a comparison, Virgin Trains recently compensated a Malaysian traveller GBP875 for her inconvenience when travelling in UK. The former example is to illustrate how a company can lose money for something beyond its control, while the latter is to illustrate how a similar train company valued its customer service. Isn't it time for KTMB to think along this line?

Happy Valentine's Day...

to whoever who celebrate and wherever they are. This is my choice since it was of my era and I can just about manage to strum and sing along...

Monday, February 13, 2012

Can Tweety the bird be safe with Slyvester the cat?

The pair formed their relationship after five-year-old Maria Fedorov brought the hungry stray kitten home to her parents house in Moscow Russia. Maria's father, Alexander, from, Moscow, Russia, said: 'Despite our fears, they moved everywhere as twins, played, slept and even ate together.'

BH forwarded the above with the following note...

They may be cute now but wait until they grow up:
Chick and kitten are a real-life version of Tweety and Sylvester.

Please note the difference between a chick and a birdie. A chick grows to become a chicken and the size depends on its species. A kampung (or village) chicken is likely to be slim and agile, and can even fly up to perch on a tree. Its size is definitely bigger than a normal bird of Tweety's kind. In the case of castrated chicken, the size can grow to more than 5 kg.! By then, even Sylvester will have to give some respect to it.

By the way, for the information of those uninitiated, a castrated chicken (aka as 'yim kai' in Cantonese) is being sold at Rm50 a kg.! This works out to Rm250 for one bird. You can complain to the government but people are willing to pay for the pleasure of eating a steamed one. As my wife would remind any of her lucky friends, she would not give unless the recipient agrees that no skin will be thrown away!
Link

Politically incorrect jokes: UK vs Malaysia

Samples from UK:

1. During last night's high winds an African family were killed by a falling tree.
A spokesman for the Birmingham City council said, "We didn't even know they were living up there."

2. Jamaican minorities in the UK have complained that there are not enough television shows with minorities in mind, so Crimewatch is being shown 5 times a week now.

An improvised one to suit our Malaysian politics...

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a Virgin"

"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

"Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.

"Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically
but he just couldn't get the system up.

"Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

"Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.

"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

"Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.

"Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.

"Husband # 9 was a Gynaecologist; all he did was look at it.

"Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was lick it ... God I miss him.

"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".

"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?"

"Because you're working for the BARISAN NASIONAL Government,
This time I KNOW I'M gonna get screwed."


Link

Statistics: when logic does not make sense

Doctors

(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.

(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000.

(C) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171

Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health and Human Services.

Now think about this:

Guns

(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000. (Yes, that's 80 million)

(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.

(C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .0000188

Statistics courtesy of FBI.

So, statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners

Remember, 'Guns don't kill people, doctors do.'

FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN,

BUT

Almost everyone has at least one doctor.
This means you are over 9,000 times more likely to be killed by a doctor as by a gun owner!!!

Please alert your friends to this alarming threat.

We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!!!!!

Out of concern for the public at large, we withheld the statistics on
lawyers, for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention!




Link

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Business: Jewish vs Chinese in US

BLACK BRAS, SIZE 38

A Chinese guy goes to a Jew to buy black bras, size 38.

The Jew, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers. Therefore he has to charge $50.00 for them.

The Chinese guy buys 25.

He returns a few days later and this time orders fifty.
The Jew tells him that they have become even harder to get and charges him $60.00 each.

The Chinese guy returns a month later and buys the Jews remaining stock of 50, and this time for $75.00 each.

The Jew is somewhat puzzled by the large demand for black size 38 bras and asks the Chinese guy, "...please tell me - What do you do with all these black bras?"

The Chinese guy answers: "I cut them in half and sell them as skull caps to you Jews for $200.00 each."


...and this is why the Chinese will own US!

"Business is business!"

In business, a typical Jew always has the last laugh

A typical Jew in traditional garb

A well known Anti-Semite, walks into a bar and is about to order a drink when he sees a guy close by wearing a jewish cap/kippa, a prayer shawl/tzitzis, and traditional locks of hair/payos.

He doesn't have to be Tiger Ah Kooi to know that this guy is Jewish. So he shouts over to the bartender so loudly, that everyone can hear, "Drinks for everyone in here, bartender, but not for that Jew over there.”;

Soon after the drinks have been handed out, he notices that the Jewish guy is smiling and waving to him and says, 'Thank You ' in an equally loud voice, so that everyone can hear.

This infuriates the Anti-Semite and in a loud voice, he once again orders drinks for everyone except the Jew.

But as before, this does not seem to worry the Jewish guy who continues to smile, and again says, "Thank you."

So the guy asks the barman, "What's the hell is the matter with that Jew? I've ordered two rounds of drinks for everyone in the bar except for him, and all that the silly bugger does is to smile and thank me in such a loud voice. Is he nuts?

"Nope," replies the bartender.

"He owns this place."
Link

KFC saga: management still undecided on the correct reply?

Is it because of the change in control of the company? There appears to be a lack of direction even in terms of a quick response to an ugly, indefensible situation where its employee attacked a disgruntled customer. Let me offer what should have been expected by the general public...

Manager of the outlet should have intervened when hearing of loud complaints. From what we have gathered, the manager lacked control over its staff and his non-intervention led to the assault. Some people are just not right for service industry, regardless of training. This can be traced to lack of discipline at home and at school which is common these days. So the old rule 'customer is king' or 'customer is always right' is treated with disdain and contempt.

After the video clips went viral in the internet, there was no response from higher management... even while I am typing this post! The least higher management should have done to alleviate any further bad publicity and to sooth the anger of the customers and general public is to offer an immediate apology for the unforeseen circumstances (shortage of chicken!) which led to the unfortunate incident. Apologise on behalf of their employees - is that too much to ask for? Western management would have offered a free meal to the aggrieved family immediately at the nearest KFC outlet. Announcing that the employees concerned have been suspended pending further investigation would help too.

(Sorry, there are several official statements as well as a video clip of KFC's Deputy President who made an announcement in Facebook.)
Link

It's so easy for some to get a doctorate

First, you get married to a man...


MARRIAGE: It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master.

Then, if your husband is PM...
http://www.malaysiakini.com/news/188774
Link

EPF is another convenient source of funds

for our political leaders to use, much like Petronas.

Petronas reports only to the PM and billions could not be explained nor accounted for over the years. It contributes half of Malaysia's annual revenues and its depleting oil wells is a cause for concern because we are so used to its contributions to finance public expenditure. GST is supposed to be introduced to provide for the expected shortfall in future. Meanwhile, EPF has provided loans to Felda (which used to be another cash cow, which is why it is worrying), and now asked to provide finance for housing loans to low-income earners.

Our government's track record has left a trail of failures which is why people should be worried of its so-called good intentions. Instead of focusing and maintaining order in implementation of policies, schemes devised are likely to be indirect with the aim of confusing the public. Initial costs of large projects looked reasonable to gain public support, but always ended up costing a few times more (eg. PKFZ, Palace, etc.). Proton was started and maintained at the expense of higher car prices borne by all purchasers of imported and locally assembled vehicles. PM's and DPM's official residences in Putrajaya are owned by Putrajaya Holdings, yet renovations by successive PMs costed tens of millions each time, which does not make sense.

Objections to the current proposal to finance housing loans to low-wage earners are treated as being harsh and looking down on them. But the government should have used its own resources to finance such schemes instead of touching on employees' savings. Politicians come and go, who will be responsible when the government cannot honour its obligations as guarantor for its increasing mega projects? Incidentally, EPF's large fund at Rm407 billion is only almost the same as Malaysia's public debt at end of 2010! Can we be blamed if we think by using EPF, it was to avoid showing it as part of national debt?

"The Employees Provident Fund (EPF) is a cash cow with billions in its coffer. To be more accurate, it has about RM407 billion, which easily makes it one of the largest funds in the world. All this billion represents the collective sweat and toil of the 13 million members. They contributed to the huge pile through compulsory deduction of their monthly salary. The money does not come from business ventures. This is a social security organisation and not a profit-making company.

But over the years, this growing gold mine began to attract the eyes of rapacious politicians in power. They saw in EPF a useful medium to bail out ailing companies. They began to put their hands in the pot and draw out huge stacks to invest in the stock market. Some RM5 billion was reportedly dumped to “shore up Bursa Malaysia” to mitigate the “effect of a global economic meltdown” a few years ago. In reality, the money was used to save a badly-hit company..."

More:
Link

Friday, February 10, 2012

1Care on health is scary by its stealth to create wealth...

for some politicians and well connected cronies.

How many of us are aware that if 1Care is considered a done deal, all employees will be burdened with a new deduction from their paychecks whether they are healthy or ill? Can you imagine being forced to pay for medical bill each month even if you are perfectly healthy? I think this is the worst form of encroachment on a person's freedom of choice. There are many people who would not see a doctor if they can help it. It is not up to us to decide for them, definitely not up to the government. What we will be getting for 1Care is likely to be something similar to NHS in UK where the main complaints are compulsory deductions, no choice of doctor and so on. We can say goodbye to what we are enjoying now: go private if you can afford it and for fast service (this is not always true), or if you have the time, go to the GH to save money.

Jackson Ng's article in Malaysia Chronicle:

Link

Thursday, February 09, 2012

Costa Concordia - the real story?

How two lovely ladies sank the cruise ship...




Another instance when we cannot believe everything in the internet!
Link

Fox Fm's Mate Match radio show...

got the whole of Sydney laughing....

Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks heard this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney .

The DJs play a game called 'Mate Match'. The DJ calls someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers 'yes', he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions.

The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with (phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

The Harbour City dropped to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you've heard yet .

Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: 'Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?'

Contestant: (laughing) 'Yes, I have.'

DJ: 'Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please.'

Contestant: 'Brian.'

DJ: 'Brian, are you married or what?'

Brian: (laughing nervously) 'Yes, I am married.'

DJ: 'Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.'

Brian: 'Sara.'

DJ: 'Is Sara at work, Brian?'

Brian: 'She is gonna kill me.'

DJ: 'Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?'

Brian: (laughing) 'Yes, she's at work.'

DJ: 'Okay, first question - when was the last time you had s*x?'

Brian: 'About 8 o'clock this morning.

DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) 'Well...'

DJ: 'Question #2 - How long did it last?'

Brian: 'About 10 minutes.'

DJ: 'Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.'

Brian: 'Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.'

DJ: 'Okay. Final question. Where did you have s*x at 8 o'clock this morning?

Brian: (laughing hard) 'I, ummm, I, well...'

DJ: 'This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?'

Brian: 'Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for couple of weeks...'

DJ: 'Uh huh...'

Brian: '...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.'

DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

Brian: 'On the kitchen table.'

DJ: 'Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up.

You listen to this.' [ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

DJ: 'Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?' (Touch tones......ringing...)

Clerk: 'Kinkos.'

DJ: 'Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?'

Clerk: 'This is she.'

DJ: 'Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.'

Sarah: (laughing) 'A couple of hours?'

DJ: 'Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any..answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... Do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?'

Sarah: 'No.'

DJ: 'Good!'

Brian: (laughing)

Sarah: (laughing) 'Brian, what the hell are you up to?'

Brian: (laughing) 'Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest..'

DJ: 'Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.

Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

DJ: 'All right. When did you last have s*x, Sarah?'

Sarah: 'Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.'

DJ: 'What time?'

Sarah: 'Around 8 this morning.'

DJ: 'Very good. Next question. How long did it last?'

Sarah: '12, 15 minutes maybe.'

DJ: 'Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?'

Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

DJ: 'Where did you have it?'

Sarah: 'OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?'

Brian: 'Just tell him, honey.'

DJ: 'What is bothering you so much, Sarah?'

Sarah: 'Well...'

DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?

Sarah: 'Up the arse.....'

They had to call an ambulance for the DJ he thought he was going to have a heart attack , he could not stop laughing. Apparently there was an unusually high call out of the Sydney Police just after this conversation, for minor traffic collisions.

(Now we know why police take statements from suspects and witnesses separately!)
Link

Friends on Facebook

Mary Schneider posted this image on Facebook. It so happens I was about to write on how I feel about so-called friends on Facebook.

In the context of the above funeral scene, it shows the number of friends one had on FB is no indication of the actual turnout at one's funeral, which is understandable.

In case some people did not realize, close friends are likely to be in touch, by phone if not in person. FB is great where friends or relations are separated by distance. It is also good for looking up long lost friends. But where the names are common, it can be frustrating going through a long list, with some faceless ones, when trying to look for a long lost friend or relative. Most require that you are already their friend before you could check for more details to confirm if you have got the right person. I had my fair share of friends who promised to 'accept' but for some reasons, did not! There are also people who are afraid of others knowing about their being in touch with old flames. In other words, we should not be too bothered by description nor whether one is already someone's friend on FB. Really close friends are likely not to be friends on FB!

I have recently added an ex-classmate in college. Somehow, for the first time, I was asked to tick whether she is 'close' friend. I did and she becomes my first and till now, my only close friend! The reason was because I did run through my list of friends on FB and most of them are relatives who cannot be considered friends because we are related. Then there are politicians who I used to be associated with or I admire from a distance. There is another ex-classmate in Kelantan who I had not met since I last visited him in University of Singapore 40 years ago! So how close is close? I knew him at the same time as my so-called 'close friend' on FB, when in college, but never in touch until I found him in FB. Besides, there are new friends I have yet to meet in person! In the case of those I don't really know, sometimes, it is difficult not to accept someone's good intention to be friend.

I am sure there are those who check on someone's friends to find out more about certain persons. Well, for those who are worried about being spied on, then they should not be on FB!

What Antares posted this morning of Feb 16:

Update: Lydia Teh's Let's be friends in The Sun on March 6:

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Classic Medicare Fraud

A Florida couple, both well into their 80's, go to a sex therapist's office.

The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?' The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?' The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse.' He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.

The next week, however, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees. This happens several weeks in a row.

The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.

Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'

The old man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare...!

Link

When our mind plays tricks on us

As a result of my recent complaints to TMnet about its internet connection, we received calls from their telemarketers asking us if we wish to upgrade our existing contract with them. Yesterday, my wife received two calls in succession. Immediately after, my sister-in-law called from KL, and my wife thought it was another such call answered, 'Apalah ini...' My sister-in-law thought she was speaking to our maid (actually we don't have any), asked if she could speak to her boss!

Anyway, I realized being old, I could be thinking of one thing while saying something else. It usually causes argument over what had been said. Recently, an older friend had been complaining about food that he had ordered for breakfast. Once, when the bowl of noodles was served, he looked at it and said he didn't order that. Since, I had yet to order, I took it instead, to the relief of the waiter. When the next bowl came, again he said it wasn't what he ordered, but after the waiter had left us. He grumbled, 'How could he make a mistake when I pointed to a picture shown at the stall?'

I had a similar problem too. But this time, it was me who pointed to No.30 (kwayteow fried with venison), a dish I had been ordering in the same restaurant for the past few times I was there. But being new, the waitress must have wrote something else without actually referring to the description in the menu. To me, 'How could they make a mistake when I gave the right number?'

Anyway, the following joke is more about fear and what it does to the mind...

A Skinny little white Irishman goes into an elevator, he looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him.

The big guy sees the little Irishman staring at him, he looks down and says: '7ft tall, 350pds, 20in penis, 3pds of testicles, Turner Brown.'

The little white Irishman faints and falls to the floor.

The big guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking him.. The big guy says, 'What's wrong with you?'

In a weak voice the little guy says, 'What EXACTLY did you say to me?'

The big dude says, 'I saw your curious look and figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me...... I'm 7ft tall, I weigh 350pds, I have a 20in penis, my testicles weigh 3pds each and my name is Turner Brown.'

The little white Irishman says: 'Turner Brown?!....Sweet Jesus, I thought you said, 'Turn around!

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Tuesday, February 07, 2012

How would you translate 'Tua Pek Kong temple'?

I had a good laugh when I read the translation by Bing in Facebook. A friend posted some pictures taken at the temple in Pasir Panjang, near Sitiawan. I could not recognize it, partly because I was distracted by the red herring 'near Batu Gajah' mentioned in FB (don't really know how it got that description, just like the translation I am going to disclose). I was trying to relate to those temples I know in BG which could have been renovated. Anyway, next to the Chinese characters in FB was a link for translation and it was, 'brother-in-law temple'!

I tried and tried to figure out but could not get how it was translated as such. But then again, 'Tua pek' in Hokien means 'father's older brother'. Sometimes, a wife might follow her children in addressing such a brother-in-law as 'tua pek' (which is relevant if brother-in-law had any relevance to this!). Therefore, 'tua pek kong' could have originated from someone (now a demi-god) who had been addressed as such before. This is highly unlikely as the term suggests relationship within a family. I still think it is more likely that it could be 'pek' as in a respectful term for an elderly man, 'tua' as in big could have been added to give it added respect, and 'kong' as in Chinese for 'god'.
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